State-administered death is always a greater horror than any other by virtue of the methodical reasoning that precedes it. French philosopher Albert Camus wrote that "capital punishment is the most premeditated of murders, to which no criminal's deed, however calculated, can be compared. "For there to be an equivalency, the death penalty would have to punish a criminal who had warned his victim of the date on which he would inflict a horrible death on him and who, from that moment onward, had confined him at his mercy for months. Such a monster is not to be encountered in private life."

Todd Willingham, his children, and burned house.
Wrongly executed?  
Based on evidence since repudiated, Cameron Willingham was convicted of setting a fire that killed his daughters.

Home Steel Home

This place I am in is of steel and stone.

And here I fell so all alone.

Only I know the pain I suffer inside:

And the loneliness I feel, I cannot hide.

It's all a game between the weak and strong.

And definitely a question of right vs. wrong.

Sometimes the good suffer with the bad.

All my friends tell of loves they have had.

I search my memory and search it deep,

And the good ones I have I know I must keep.

For they are the ones that give me hope;

They give me the strength to cope.

Daily I face problems, but take them in stride,

If anyone said it was easy, I promise you they lied.

There is nothing easy about being here,

Especially when your loved ones cannot be near.

There are days and nights I find no rest,

And often my Pride is Put to the test.

This other world in which I dwell,

can I be sure this isn't Hell.

If there is a hell worse than this

I pray to God I'm not on the list

I've learned a lesson, I learned it well

I'm going to Heaven cause I'm going through Hell

Brutal realities

Damp liquid salts

Quickering riverbeds of flesh

My Life ... shattered 

Memories ... Tattered

In a cold crystal cell

So long ago, so far away

was everything truly there

or dreams spun on a merry - go - round

In this cold crystal Hell!!

When I'm Gone

when I die, remember that what you knew of me

will be with you always.

What is buried is only the shell of what was do not regret the shell, but remember the man.

Remember the Father, remember the person

Remember the friend.

 By Todd Willingham # 999041

De-Press-ion

Drunk on given in / contemplating given up

Dying before dying / lying, crying to yo/self

while smiling with everyone else

no mail, no hope / no exit, no love

De-Press-ion

Com-Press-ion

Hearts bound with chains

Emotional expansion restricted

straining from the weight of this sentence

Heavy the pull on my shoulders

Pressing harder as I grow older

The passage of time makes my air thicker

Shortness of breath with emotional twitches

Like popcorn bursting beneath my skin

Kicking skin, chasing nails

Black nervous sweat rolls down my soul

One more chance, one more strike

Another bullet dodged, another date escaped

The systems shrapnel shredding my brain

Body tense, like rigid sprung steel

Emotional intrusions / Allusions feel real

Already dead / Refusing to fall

Depression

Halloween Sunset 1999

Thunderhead black

   Oppressed grey

Liquid steel horizon

   Scatter shot beams

Like laser light shows

Raining on the watchtower

   Penetratin' my glass

Hot metal to water

shimmering graceful waves

Napalm dancing disappears

   Surrounded

Blackness reclaimed

Envelopes my world

outside becomes inside

AGAIN!  

By Todd Willingham # 999041

Promised Lies...

Into life we are cast

Pushed... Pulled ... severed from bliss

Blackness, Redness, blinding whiteness

Torn from calm by crimson claws

seeing, crawling, walking, falling;

Burbling, learning, yearning, burning

Fueled by Passion, sexed by Drugs

Chained to Ideology, given no choise

Promised falsehood, brainwashed in thought

Finding love while loosing innocence

Encloced in creation, loved by our souls creations

Blinded, Bludgewed, Tipped by lies

sliced into Pieces by decedent hearts fies

Betrothaled the heavens, given Anarchy

slowing, drawing, fading, falling

Cut hard, bled deep, crying out to deaf ears

Barbed wire cradling a callused core

shoaly graves feed Mans decay

By Todd Willingham # 999041

No backing up now! This is it.

surrounded by Death unable to maintain

No release for pent up Angst

Tormented, Tortured & Twisted

To the point of human combustion

stepping outside myself for relief

To escape the piercing wail of my soul

Standing beside myself, watching me watch myself

No escape, no love, no life!

Fleeting urges to brutalize myself for releasement

of this "system" created rage of destructive isolation

My worse prison? My own Mind!

Justice Denied ... 2004

Who knew that justice could be so blind

The scales to rust with the passage of time

stripped of love, my life, all but pride

Everyday my Hands are tied...

Defenseless to push away the tide

Head held under waves of lies

Drown in blood of thier Genocide

It's all gone wrong and the Innocent die

while the Guilty laugh on the mountainside

Assurance

The State wants to prove, that crime doesn't pay.

They won't let injustice stand in the way.

They have to convict someone of the crime;

They really care not if it's your life or mine.

They worry not, Though there is no evidence,

only asking the judge for the trail to commence.

They cannot afford to take any chances,

and around the court the D.A. prances.

Trial is not fair, al is gigged.

The whole justice system, truly is tigged.

The Judge reads the verdict in just one breath;

I am found guilty and sentence to Death.

The state of Texas is being trill,

They have found, they can legally Kill.

I now sit and wait, here on Death Row,

I know late one night my life will go.

I don't want their needle laced in my arm,

I could never have caused one of then harm.

My Daughters

Amber, Karmen + Kameron

Beauty is you in so many ways:

The warmth of your beauty, brightens my Day. 

When I feel lonely I think only of you:

And I say to myself, these feelings are true. 

 

I know that your beauty, flows deep within:

And all that's been broken, your love will mend.

This beauty of yours, is totally unique:

It's much more valuable than priceless Antiques.

 

This beauty of yours captured my heart:

I've had those feelings right from the start.

Cause never before have I known such love:

I'll cherish it always I know it's my duty.

 

This beauty I speak of yours by right:

Since birth you've made my life sunny & bright.

You have brought Happiness to me beyond a doubt:

And this love and beauty I cannot life without.

 

There is nothing more beautiful than you on this earth:

I cannot express what your beauty is worth.

There is not enough money or treasures of gold:

O'equal in value your love & beauty Holds,

Your love to me is all I know, without you in my life 

I'm worthless & cold.

Todd Willingham 

February 1,  2004